Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
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