im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize