Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
Swine flu is the new snow day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
Randomize