I think i peed on brittanys purse
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
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