yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
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There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
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drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
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