There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
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I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
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I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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