so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
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I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
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I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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