I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize