he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
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she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
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