if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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