mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Randomize