My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
Randomize