My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize