if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize