True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize