booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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