Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
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I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
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He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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