Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize