he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
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