yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
they're like a gay fantastic four
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The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
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Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
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