I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
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Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
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So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
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