i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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