Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
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She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
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There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
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