he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I love how my cats smell like pot.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
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