I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
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She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
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A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
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