your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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