I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize