there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize