she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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