thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
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Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
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Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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