Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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