I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
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