you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize