I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize