It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
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