i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
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