A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Randomize