Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Randomize