If i come over, it means nothing
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
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