the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
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