trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Shame - the story of my life.
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