why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
This is classic penis vs brain.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
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