I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Randomize