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There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
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