Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
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We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
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I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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