you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
vagina is talking i cant
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
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They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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