Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy. http://tfl.nu/pes5
  Replies (12) Good night (427) Bad night (3843) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (403): i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober http://tfl.nu/y1xh
  Replies (28) Good night (1018) Bad night (3786) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (337): View more from Louisiana

  Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (337): Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things. http://tfl.nu/jc42
  Replies (9) Good night (1055) Bad night (2988) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from England

  phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that... http://tfl.nu/hzwk
  Replies (25) Good night (4601) Bad night (757) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table http://tfl.nu/dmz2
  Replies (92) Good night (841) Bad night (4930) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there. http://tfl.nu/abjc
  Replies (18) Good night (5181) Bad night (945) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (651): I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me http://tfl.nu/s22y
  Replies (13) Good night (4357) Bad night (1324) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (708): Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic. http://tfl.nu/b2ov
  Replies (15) Good night (1498) Bad night (5709) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (214): so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat http://tfl.nu/flbd
  Replies (3) Good night (2303) Bad night (907)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests. http://tfl.nu/12h2
  Replies (11) Good night (2626) Bad night (781)
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (336): There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed http://tfl.nu/1ryb
  Replies (4) Good night (1337) Bad night (808) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka http://tfl.nu/edtb
  Replies (8) Good night (1718) Bad night (632) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (281): View more from Texas

  I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (281): I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts http://tfl.nu/b2dg
  Replies (1) Good night (764) Bad night (616) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (336): View more from North Carolina

  Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (336): Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army. http://tfl.nu/tv7a
  Replies (11) Good night (840) Bad night (739) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (843): I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least. http://tfl.nu/90gk
  Replies (5) Good night (610) Bad night (183) Order T-Shirt

Randomize