She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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