either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize