This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
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